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Experts tackle every Q you might have on the practice of choking during sex, aka erotic asphyxiation. If the thought of someone's hand on your neck — or vice versa — asphyxiation kink you on, then welcome. Choking during sex isn't a new kink.
It isn't something outlandish that nobody's ever thought of. But it has become extremely popular or at least entered the public discussion in part because of a December incident with a New Jersey nineteen-year-old who accidentally died while doing it with a play partner. Unlike other kinks such as rope bondage and foot playchoking comes with serious risks. Doing so strips someone of their oxygen, and with that comes huge responsibility. The best way to practice choking during sex, if you choose to practice it at all, is to understand the risks and do everything you can to educate yourself on how you can incorporate it safely.
Here, sex therapists share all the info you need on how to practice choking during sex in a safe way — because safe sex is informed sex. Let's get into the nitty-gritty of where the fascination lies with choking during sex as asphyxiation kink as some key points to remember before giving it a go. Choking is a type of erotic asphyxiation EA or breath play that can be done during solo or partnered sex when done solo, it's technically called autoerotic asphyxiation.
It's literally an intentional restriction of oxygen to the brain for sexual pleasure. Choking during sex is one of many forms of breath play. Other forms include nose-pinching, mouth-covering, and breath-holding.
Breath play in all its forms falls under the umbrella of edge play — any sexual activity that has the potential to cause serious harm. What gets someone to that state of arousal varies as there are a few levels of choking to consider. Then, "once oxygen flow returns, the body exhales, literally," says Grinonneau-Denton.
The brain takes the pain from a asphyxiation kink context and translates that back to the body as pleasure. Because, actually, pain and pleasure activate similar parts of the brain associated with triggering dopamine. There's also the power-play component.
The ability to be in control of or give control to your partner can be liberating. It can also showcase immense vulnerability.
Why someone might be into choking could be any of these factors or a combination asphyxiation kink them. From the physical body sensations to flirting with death, the reason why someone enjoys choking during sex is personal, just like any sexual interest. And when it comes to restricting oxygen, something we all need to survive and continue to live, the stakes certainly don't become lower.
There's no way to skirt around the dangers involved in the practice of choking. So it's imperative that you know what you're getting yourself into before attempting it. Note: Identifying and understanding the risks of sexual activity doesn't equate to shaming someone for expressing their sexual interests. If choking during sex is something you're interested in exploring, by all means, do it — but do it safely.
Speaking of exploring the practice of choking safely, here are some practical ways to go about that. Educating asphyxiation kink about the anatomy of the neck can help you learn which grips are the safest and how to apply pressure. There are some pretty important parts of the body that either pass through the neck or are directly in the neck, including the spinal cord, vocal cords, part of the esophagus, jugular veins that drain blood from the face, neck, and brain, and carotid arteries that supply blood to the head and neck. No matter if you're using your hands, ties, or other restraints, it's better to engage in breath play as an informed individual.
In this case, informed about the anatomy of the neck. Someone who's familiar with the practice and is able and willing to show you how to apply pressure with less risk. Consent needs to be on asphyxiation kink mind the entire time; once is not enough. This includes asking before you engage in a form of breath play like choking, as well as checking in during the scene to see how both of you are feeling.
Everyone involved has a say about what's going down. Don't assume that because there was consent at the beginning or the first time that there will be consent throughout a scene or every time. Here's exactly what consent entails and how to ask for it properly — before and during a sexual experience. You need to feel comfortable enough with your partner to create and express your boundaries, including verbal and nonverbal cues.
And they need to feel comfortable creating and expressing the same with you. Everyone needs to be on the same wavelength before engaging in a form of breath play like choking. When you restrict someone's breathing, nonverbal cues safe motions can come in handy. Talking with and listening to your partner keeps you present. You can gain a better understanding of your likes and dislikes, their likes and dislikes, and create an all-around safer scene. You want to be as present and asphyxiation kink as possible to ensure the experience is as safe and pleasurable as possible. Also, consent under the influence isn't really consenting.
If you want to practice choking during sex, leave alcohol and drugs out of the equation, for your safety and for your partner's. By Alex Shea April 08, Save FB Tweet More. Woman having an orgasm with hand on her neckChoking Sex and Erotic Asphyxiation. Credit: Getty Images. By Alex Shea. Be the first to comment! No comments yet. Close this dialog window Add a comment. Add your comment Cancel Submit. Back to story Comment on this project. Tell us what you think Thanks for adding your feedback. Close in.
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